Playing the Attitude Game

April 8, 2010 at 11:01 am | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Well, it just had to happen, didn’t it?  Here it is, April 8th, and it’s snowing.  I didn’t look up the details, but I think it’s been well over a month since we’ve had any significant amount of snow- and now there’s a light dusting on the ground, and more keeps falling.   We had such a beautiful March- the nicest I remember in many years.  We got spoiled, and I think most of us knew it, and we were just waiting for this to happen, but hoped it wouldn’t.

But ya know what?  It’s okay!  I remember even 4 years ago, I would have let this ruin my day- I would have been down & depressed.  I am a sun lover, I love being warm and feeling the sun on my face and coming through the windows.  As I mentioned in a previous post, I used to be a victim of SAD- Seasonal Affective Disorder.  Now, that’s not saying I like the weather today- no, not at all.  But I am in a better frame of mind to deal with it, and see it as a minor inconvenience now, not a total downer.

I’ve come along way with that idea with a lot of things in my life.  Things that I used to totally let determine my attitude, instead of me deciding I wasn’t going to let it bother me.  Things like, people cutting me off in traffic, or leaving their cart in the middle of the isle at the grocery store, (which I think all of us tend to do that once in a while- but then get upset at someone else doing it- I know I have!), an annoying co-worker, or this is a biggie- our children’s attitude!  I know I have to constantly be on my guard, so that when one of my kids start getting all bent out of shape about something, I am not going to be bent with them!  I have to make that conscious decision to, 1) take a deep breath, 2) get their attention and 3) help them to understand it’s not going to do any good to get mad.  We got a Wii for Christmas- it amazes me that the younger 2 think they should be able to play some of the games perfectly the first time!  They’d get so upset, it was ridiculous!   I think I finally made some progress- they got a new game for Easter, and they both again, got so angry they weren’t able to do the go-carts very well- they kept crashing and coming in 4th place.  After explaining to them, it’s just a game, it’s not important to win, especially when they’re just learning it, what is important, is that they have fun.  And if they are not having fun, they’ll have to stop playing, it’s not worth it.  They played a little more and did better.  The next day, they were very good, even Jenaya came in to the kitchen and said, “mommy, I’m still coming in last but I’m not getting upset!”  Ahhhh, progress!  Then later, in the game, during another round- she was so excited, she came in 3rd place and beat her brother!

So how can we learn from that?

We tend to get upset when we aren’t accomplishing something as quickly as we want to.  But, just like when Jenaya learned to be calm, was she able to then play better, focus more on learning the game, and then being able to improve her skills.  We all need to work on that.  Be calm, (but excited to be learning something or doing something we want is also a good thing), focus on what we need to learn, and then go do it- and as we go out and do it, we’ll get better and better!  But we can’t get better if we’re getting upset, and or, hibernating and not practicing and using the skills we’ve learned.

So let’s focus on choosing how we’re going to respond to something or someone, instead of reacting.  The main thing I remind myself often is, “in the grand scheme of things, is this going to really matter- either later today, tomorrow, or next week or next year?”  “Probably not, I most likely won’t even remember this incident.”  And that helps me to stay focused on what is important, which we’ve covered in a couple previous posts, and also helps me to then do what is important.

Make today the best day ever!

Amy

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